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Facebook may never roll out a "dislike" button, but anger orannoy someone enough and they won't need it. They'll just click the "unfriend"button instead. Then again, if you want to whittle down your roster of friendsfrom all over the world, you don't need to get all that creative. You just needto do one of the five things below.

Vague "Woe Is Me" Statuses

Feeling blue? Had a rough day? Post about it but be totallyvague. Statuses such as "I'm done with dating" and "this is horrible..." are sureto elicit a few replies from friends asking about what happened meaningyou'll get the attention you seek but your friend list is sure to diminish aswell.

After all, people don't want to read about how sad you areconstantly, sadly enough. Plus, post enough vague statuses about any topicunder the sun, and you're sure to annoy some people to no end. So if that'syour goal on the social media site, get your "ahhh!" and "bummer" postsscheduled well in advance.


This isn't just about posting private messages meant for oneperson and one person only on your timeline or theirs. It's also about simplyproviding too much information that the whole wide world doesn't want to readabout. If you're looking to gross out your Facebook friends, be sure to post aboutyour bowel movements, farts and other bodily functions frequently.

Be Inspirational

A nice quote is great every now and then, but there's only somany times people want to be told, "chin up, tomorrow's a new day."Inspirational quotes are even better when they're super-imposed over a photo orused in a meme. Deluge your feed with these types of quotes and watch yourfriendship numbers dwindle.


Let's face it; all social media sites are a way to show thebest parts of your life (unless you're a "woe-is-me" poster). If you're onPinterest or Facebook, it's so easy to show off what's so awesome about yourlife (and make others feel their life is hardly up to par), whether you'reposting photos of your trip to Italy or constantly thanking God for bringingyour husband and kids into your life. Bragging can even be about the awesome you bought foryour Ferrari and then posting hundreds of photos of them. The awards fromyour local bake-off win are also sure to embitter your friends after awhile.

The Extraordinarily Mundane

Last but not least, tell your friends all about your day, nomatter how trivial the moment. "Headed to the gym now!" you might say. Or, "lazySunday on the couch." True, these are updates on your current status throughand through, but talk about booooring.Facebook is not about keeping your parents up to date about your everydayminutiae. Then again, if you think you're so interesting that everyone willwant to know that you just sneezed, go ahead and post away.

But if you'd rather keep your Facebook friends, myadvice is: stay positive, be entertaining and above all, stop bragging!